Short Funny Quotes

Here is a small collection of Short Funny Quotes

“Marriage is a three ring circus: engagement ring, wedding ring, and suffering.” –Unknown

“A lot of people are afraid of heights. Not me, I’m afraid of widths.”  –Steven Wright.

Everybody wants to live forever,  but nobody wants to grow old. — Jonathan Swift

“I never think of the future – it comes soon enough.” — Albert Einstein

Until I was 13, I thought my name was ‘Shut Up.’ – –Unknown

If you want a friend in Washington, get a dog. — Harry S. Truman

“Beware of the young doctor and the old barber.”  —-Benjamin Franklin.

A rich man’s joke is always funny.” –Unknown

There are no stupid questions, just stupid people. — Unknown

Everybody wants to go to heaven; but nobody wants to die. -Unknown

In God we trust; all others must pay cash. – -Unknown

If there is a “WILL”, there are 500 relatives. –Unknown

Computers make very fast, very accurate mistakes. –Unknown

The road to success is always under construction. –Unknown

He who laughs last didn’t get it.  –-Unknown